Bodleian Library, Sunday 13th September 2020

30 Over Match: Bodleian Library beat Inkpen by 26 runs (Bodleian Library 155/9 in 30 overs, Inkpen 129/8 in 30 overs)

Team: Dave Lester (Capt), Doug Hall, James Hall, David Lamb, David Glitz, Simon Hanna, Richard Mitchell, Milo Darke, Phil Day, Jeff Hutchinson, Simon Darke

Match report by Dave Lester…

So as the season starts to draws to a very sunny conclusion and with Inkpen’s ground basking in glorious sunshine, The ginger cream was being rapidly applied. This weeks victors sorry visitors were Bodleian librarians who are a very friendly if not slightly noisey group of gents. This game last year was a very close affair according to the scorebook and hopefully this year we would add another win to our record season.

As the coin fell out of the sky it was obvious that skipper Dave “ will I ever win one” Lester was going to lose the toss and with that the chance for him to get back in his coffin out of the heat and sun. So into the field Inkpen went and as has been the norm for the last few matches it was the skipper to open the bowling. The look of horror on the face of our returning ex skipper dave “ my ribs have healed so I can play again glitz” however would suggest that this may be a bad choice. That was until the first 10 overs however with Dave “ look at that turn” Lester alongside Milo “i’m the better Darke bowler” Darke restricting the opening pair to 36 however without any wickets falling the match was finely poised. As the first Bowling change came and with the field diving around like there was an end of season award dinner not far away, it was over to Inkpen newest sighing Dave “ look at those flares” Lamb and James “ I’m too good for this standard” Hall to carry on the good work and how they did carry it on… well one of them did anyways. With dave “ astro turf is much easier than the inkpen pitch “ Lamb pitching the ball closer to his own feet than the off stump it was James “ jimmy Anderson” Hall who took the first wicket all be it with yet another contender for catch of the season from Simon “the agent” Darke. So as the 20th over rolled round Inkpen were in a great position with the score reading 99 for 1, however don’t be fooled Inkpen are the masters of Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. So as we neared the next bowling change it soon became apparent that we were now short on regular bowlers and that we would need to call on the services of one of inkpen most prolific wicket takers, with a record of 1 ball 1 wicket to his name Jeff” I have to bowl how many” Hutchinson was up and once again he struck, removing the opener with Inkpen’s oldest trick 5 crap balls followed by a 6th which gets them out. Credit however must go to Rich “ we cant believe you didn’t drop it” Mitchell who some how managed to thrust a left hand in the air and cling on to the catch all with out hurting himself. So as the run rate increased and the scoreboard looked slightly more healthy, Inkpen called on their secret weapon… we didn’t know this at the time of calling on him but Doug “ can bowl a bit” Hall showed where his son gets it from. With 3 wickets falling including a double wicket maiden… (that’s right readers Inkpen’s CC first ever double wickets maiden), it looked like Inkpen were in with a sniff of victory and with a run out (don’t ask me how) the librarians finished on 155 for 8, and with the pink hat of shame not being worn once and the opposition commenting on how tight we were in the field (I cant take much more of 2020) Inkpen felt they were maybe on for another victory…. Or not

So with the sun beating down and the skipper looking as red as Dicko’ s tee shirt (still not washed it, have you) and Inkpen’s regular opener STILL on holiday, Yes Pat i’m talking to you. It was decided that this week we should have a family affair, with both the halls batting together. So with the scorer wiping a proud tear from her cheek, the two halls set about the chase. It is said that as you become more mature in years that you slow down and take things at a gentler pace, these words of wisdoms are clearly printed on the Halls kitchen wall, as James “the young one” hall gave his poor mother “ the scorer” a blunt pencil by taking the attack to the opening bowlers playing some beautiful shots for four, Doug “the slightly older one” Hall decided that his role was to not hit the runs but to support his son and what a fine job he did… that was until his son ran him out for 2 in the 14th over with the score 34. So as Doug “yes that’s right 2 off 14 overs “ hall had a rest enjoying some of Simon “Al Capone” Hanna’s moonshine which had arrived. Inkpen’s new big hitting, high scoring batsman strode out to bat. Off the back of a lovely 76 not out in his first game Dave “I wanna be in the duck gang” Lamb soon dropped back to an appropriate level for inkpen by being bowled for 0. This led to the skipper coming out with the usual words of wisdom from Dave “don’t swing at every ball” Glitz ringing in his ears, moonshine flowing through his veins and enough ginger cream on to survive nuclear radiation leak. So with the run rate needing to be a little higher the skipper forgot the advice provided and tried to hit every ball towards the moon, this worked for around 10 balls before he chased a very wide ball onto the next pitch, top edging it straight down slips throat. Oh dear the collapse was on, however we still had the young James “twinkle toes” hall dancing down the track to every ball and also joining him, the return of the glitz ( a bit like the mack but with more swagger). These two started to up the rate and after 20 overs inkpen were 83-3. The chase was still on and not only was the chase on but Inkpen was about to see another record fall. With one more dance and swing of his bat James “that batting strip in my garden is paying off” Hall became the youngest every player to score a 50 for inkpen. His celebration however was to be short lived as the confidence grew from a lovely knock James decided that he didn’t need to see what the new bowler bowled like and that every ball was going for 6… that was until the bowler removed his off stump with his very first ball, and has the bails hit the floor so did the hope of a village knowing that there were very few big hitters left especially after Simon “one shot” Hanna was caught swinging (we have told him not to do it whilst we’re playing cricket). Although Rich “Bairstow” Mitchell hit a quick… (no your eyes do not trick you it does say quick) 19 not out and Jeff and Phil both hit their highest every inkpen score of 3. Inkpen fell just short scoring 129 off their 30 overs.

So as the moonshine flowed and the sun dipped behind the trees (thank god for that I can come out now) some of the Inkpen players were reflecting on the final game of their season. They were also looking forward be able to move pain free on Monday mornings again and not having to wash their whites for at least another 9 months, although there is some debate about how many actually wash their whites. So on we go to the final game of the season, however thanks to Covid it won’t involve our usual end of season bbq, which is a shame as I was hoping it would fill at least 2 paragraphs of the match report, talking about how 11 blokes would be dribbling at the thought of big Rich’s giant sausage. But alas I’ll just have to write about another famous inkpen victory…. to be continued